Trauma and Beauty and Lao women's textiles
I haven’t sent a newsletter for a while, but there are a couple of things I wanted to share with you today.
Firstly, I'm delighted that In Her Nature has been shortlisted for The Great Outdoors magazine's Readers' Awards (in the Outdoor Book or Writer of the Year Award category). The winner is determined by online voting, so if you enjoyed my book and have time to vote (and even to cajole friends and family into voting), I'd be so so grateful. The link is here: https://www.smartsurvey.co.uk/s/TGOawards2024/
Secondly, today is the 2nd anniversary of my husband’s suicide. That day, plus the time before & after, are preserved in me as a core of pure horror. I find it very difficult to write about, partly because many aspects have to remain private, and also because I’ve come to distrust language.
There have been so many lies; as well as attempts to bully me, to force me to say or not say certain things, to twist words to attack me, to break down my boundaries, and so very many empty assurances.
Language hasn’t helped me. If anything, it’s been my enemy. Which is hard for a writer to accept.
I’ve found refuge in my body instead: in yoga, strength training, gentle running, keeping on breathing. I’ve felt reduced to an animal at times.
Any positive emotions over the last 2 years have generally come from non-verbal experiences of beauty: views from hills, the sun on my face. In the language of trauma therapy, it feels like beauty has the effect of calming my nervous system.
(Sorry if this sounds pretentious; it’s the only way I can describe it.)
I’ve been lucky enough to spend the last month in Laos, which is the most beautiful country I’ve ever visited. And perhaps the most beautiful thing is the extraordinary textile art created by Lao women - who have such painful experience of the relationship between trauma and beauty.
I want to learn and write about the aesthetic practices of different Lao minority groups. Perhaps one day I’ll also write about horror, language and beauty. But for now, I just want to share a few of these stunningly beautiful artworks with you. ((Apologies for my dodgy photos, and for the creasing - some of these fabrics have been in my suitcase for weeks!).
Lao women’s art is not widely known about here (I don’t think there’s *ever* been an exhibition). Some traditions are under threat. It takes c. 3 months to create a weaving. Because these women’s art is globally underappreciated, it’s hard for the artists to sustain their work.
So, on this #BlueMonday, please enjoy some samples of this extraordinary beauty.